MRT Commuter Files – Full Contact Fighting Skills Required

The train doors open. It is a promise of wealth, redemption and Nirvana. Entering would mean transport commencing to that place where you hopefully distill your dreams into useable reality. You’ve taken time to prep yourself for the day, crisp ironed clothes, shined shoes, hair made up, and cologne. The day is to start full of promise. You try to take one step, to enter that gleaming cabin, and all hell breaks loose.

Suddenly you’re crushed in a wall of people, an elbow get jammed in your throat, a shoulder shoving you towards the left and another one pushing you to the right. You’re getting stepped on, and people are using you as a fulcrum to propel themselves forward. Worse, some pervert rubs his pecker into you, and he does not care if you’re Adam or Eve. What on earth happened?

Well on the MRT, education and culture does not play a factor. It is the law of the jungle that prevails, meaning the stronger you are the better off you are. Forget about lines, politeness and courtesy. Forget about letting women and children sit, let alone go first through the door. Forget about the elderly, after all they resort to hitting you with umbrellas or bags anyway.

The only rule that remains is, avoid getting run over by the train. The guards pretty much let everything slide as long as there are no closed fists flying. So feel free to use everything, like bending your knees and then launching yourself into that throng at the proper instant to get yourself a prime space. Or dip your shoulders and pretend you’re getting pushed so you can cut-off that line-cutter’s path to the train door and get yourself in. You get revenge and satisfaction all at the same time. Remember this, most of everyone will be fighting like hell to get themselves into the coach, they will be resorting to all manner of tricks, they will be cursing and verbally assaulting your sensibilities while they try to get the upper hand, but at the end of it, everyone is just relieved to not have to wait a little longer that they let it pass. Until it’s the time to go down, and the battle resumes yet again.

Do you need a useful tip? Learn Karate.